If you’re reading this, you’re probably thinking, “Oh man, my thoughts exactly!” We have all had them and have heard plenty about them…bad neighbors.
– Junk all over the place
– Barking dogs
– Screaming kids
– Wal-Mart neighbors
– Inappropriate holiday decorations
– Parties all the time
– Spousal fighting
– Spying on you
– The gossipers
– the list goes on…
The question for this post is what to do about them. I will not hold you in suspense…the answer is nothing. This issue is probably more about your own personality than anything else. Most neighbors, with the exception of a few obvious ones, are decent people with slightly different views on things. A big problem is called festering. Here is a scenario: You move into a new neighborhood and live there for a few years. No one (because of the new world we live in) ever really gets to know each other, or introduces themselves to each other, for that matter. You keep noticing different things that your neighbors do (and trust me, we all notice the things our neighbors do, and vice-versa). After a while, you start complaining to yourself about all the stupid things that everyone in the neighborhood does and these things become REALLY annoying to you. This is where it starts…and very soon, you may snap. Have you ever had this feeling?
Now, think about your childhood. Think back about how much you used to scream or terrorize the neighborhood and how much of a mess you used to make…your bike lying on the front yard for days. Think about how the basketball hoop was on its side in the driveway for months at a time right next to the broken lawnmower. Think about the effect that had on your neighbors.
Now think about today. Think about how much your dog barks and how much your kids scream. Now, think about the neighbors that you do like and actually talk to. What kind of annoying things do they do? If you really pay attention, they probably do most of the things that everyone else does, but you don’t pay attention to it anymore because you like these people. Why do you like them? Most likely because they introduced themselves to you way back when you first moved in and now you have an affinity toward them. I guess it’s common human nature…dislike and distrust of the unknown or unfamiliar.
There are tons of websites about this topic, but here are a few really funny ones:
If you browse through these, you’ll find a common theme – revenge. The people who write in and share their stories truly want revenge. They want to hurt their neighbors physically, mentally, and financially. You know, I bet that if these neighbors just sat down and had a conversation with each other and got over themselves, everything would be okay.
Say you have a neighbor who is a slob. What ever happened to the world where one of us walked over there and asked if we could help out? No, I guess we don’t do that anymore.
The point is this – we all come from different sub-cultures and cultures. We all have different ways of doing things. We have got to learn how to put up with one another or we will just live our lives complaining about one another. Let’s get involved with the sloppy guy and the kids down the road. Let’s get drunk at least once with the Peacock family across the way. Let’s try to understand what makes these people tick and get used to them, because if we don’t, we will just keep running to different towns across the country to one day find a perfectly situation neighborhood full of people just like us. After a few months, we will find something we don’t like about them either.
Think hard before you choose to dismiss your neighbors, because they will most likely be the ones to call the fire department if your house is on fire or stop on the highway when you have a flat tire. At least try to love…or at a minimum like thy neighbor.
Comments for How to Deal With a Bad Neighbor
Note: Some of these comments below are the greatest in the world. They pretty much cover the spectrum of describing lousy neighbors as well as giving suggestions for what to do about them. If you have a comment of your own to add, please scroll all the way to the bottom of the page to do so. Thanks!
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Elizabeth: I am so fed up with my neighbor. He always throw trash on my property. Regardless of me calling the cops about it plenty of times nothing is ever done about it. To a point I installed cameras just so the cops can see that they are the ones throwing trash onto my property and that I have evidence of it. Still nothing is done to them. Recently today they took my bumper off of my car and I am just so anger I don’t want to do at this point.
JG: Your neighbor took the bumper off your car? Did I read that correctly? I would say you have a bigger problem than having a bad neighbor. Can you move? Can you get out of there? Sometimes you have to leave bad neighbors behind.
ceedeekay: We just put up security cameras week ago and the neighbor just found out (put them up on a side of our house that has no windows to keep an eye on our property and if they throw anything into the yard at the dog – so far found sharpened pencils and a broken beer bottle). We put them up due to the fact that our house and cars have been vandalized.
Today, the neighbor came outside to the side of the house in broad daylight, pulled his penis out and peed on our fence. One minute later 6 children came out to play in the driveway.
We will be moving in the next year. This is the harassment that we have been dealing with since 2004, just escalated with the installation of the cameras.
Lori: Omg!!
That sounds like a nightmare!!
Good luck on your future move.
I hope you end up with decent neighbors!
Bill: No way. Don’t move out. That’s bad advice.
Dana Wirth: This thread is really old but 15Ketey, what a pussy you are. The action of the neighbor removing the bumper from this person’s car is called THEFT and you report it to the police, you don’t move…I would advise anyone seeking advice from you to go elsewhere..
I will be seeking my advise elsewhere.
JG: Thank you for the insightful comment Dana!
Paul: That’s good advice, but what if your neighbor is a total A$$hat? What if you suspect that they are burying toxic waste in the back yard? What if they are holding loud raucous parties late on weekday nights? What if they are shooting off huge fire works and may burn down the neighorhood? Sometimes being Ghandi is fine, other times a more Schwartzkpof like attitude is needed, preferably before you snap.
JG: I hear you loud and clear my aggressive friend. Perhaps I can explain my point of view this way: When I was growing up, there was one family that we (my friends and I) really hated. I have no memory of why we hated them. Someone must have done something. We were hell to them. We were loud and obnoxious…the worst nightmare you could imagine. They would do things to get back at us and we would do things 20 times worse to get back at them.
Years later, they joined as members to the gym I worked at. They were very polite and we dicussed what the heck went on back in the day. I apologized and everything was fine. We actually became good friends.
The only reason this happened is probably because I grew up a little bit, but thinking back, if they had come over and had spoken to my parents and were as nice as pie to me, they would’ve sucked out all my ammo. I would’ve had no choice but to respond kindly to them.
All I am saying is to talk to people before you buy a tank or call the cops.
Maybelline: You’re a wuss. Bad neighbors deserve some Liquid Ass.
Mrkoolio: Maybelline….will you marry me.? I am embarrassed to ask, but what is liquid ass?
I will do ANYTHING FOR my neighbors and I don’t say boo when they are loud. In turn, I never hear a word when my kid…or me…are loud or crank up some Van Halen for all to hear.
The one guy that messed with our joint wall and said something to my kids? He got the “Ac/dc treatment”….
I wait until he has a party on Friday night and he stays up real late. The next morning I go into my backyard to check out how loud my stereo system will be for a party I might have I set the speakers up pointing at his house and then I crank it up full blast …… Just to check out the volume for my upcoming party of course. Then something always distract me and I have to leave immediately and saw the Music stays on for 34 hours until I get back . When I get back the neighbor is red-faced on the fuse front lawn the police are there and I simply apologize and say that I was testing my stereo and I got a call and I forgot to turn it off and I had to run out.
The cop smiled and said, “OK please don’t let that happen again and then he leaned in and said and I don’t think your neighbor will be bothering you anymore he got the message . You squashed him in front of his in laws who were sleeping over.
That is the AC/DC treatment. The end of the story is actually pretty amazing. This guy who I did not respect her like it all came over knocked on my door apologize for his prior behavior and stuck out his hand. I learned a long time ago for my dad on the new matter how much you hate somebody or how much you want to refuse somebody’s apology, there will come when you have to apologize to somebody and there is nothing worse then put it all on the line and apologizing and being totally going to roll and having the person say I don’t except your apology. Anyway I immediately took his hand and shook it and I said by Gansz everything is forgotten let’s start fresh would you like a beer ….. It was 11 AM on a Sunday and he really doesn’t drink but he came in and had two beers and watchec football with me. After that I brought his trash cans in for him I watched out and took care of his house and dog when he was gone somebody was I won’t leave his house for a Rudy wants and I alerted him in the police. We talked about it later and he told me that he was SO MAD that morning, but that he had never heard me say and unkind word to any neighbor, even those who let their dogs poop on my lawn with her kids come over and shoot baskets in front of my house at 7 AM on Saturday morning I say nothing so he thought that he must’ve done something really offensive for me to take that kind of action and he said he didn’t want to apologize but he knew but I was crazy enough to administer AC/DC treatments every Saturday morning for a year and he also knew that if you apologize no matter how much I hated him for just like to him, I would not be disrespectful and turn down his apology I would stick out my hair and wipe the slate clean I told him he was a smart man LOL
JG: Well said.
Macon: I think you’re forgetting that many people do try to resolve their conflicts with their neighbors politely as possible. Most people I know try to give their neighbors the benefit of the doubt, at least at first. No one enjoys hostile conflicts. Most of the stories I’ve read on the Net, say something like, “I went over and tried to discuss my concerns, but he ignored me.”
The majority of people will not call in the authorities unless they have been provoked to the snapping point. Since we were kids, we’ve been conditioned to deal with our poblems on our own and not be a “tattletale.”
Unless the nuisance happens consistently and is unbearable, many people simply try to find ways to accommodate it.
Catherine: I have tried to resolve conflicts with 3 sets of my neighbors – 2 of which are older than I and the other younger. The old English couple next door have been offensive, rude, and abusive to me if I call attention to something they are doing which is illegal and bothering me. The other older neighbors who are grandparents had their grandchildren screaming around their yard next door from 10 am til 7 pm, 7 nights per week, all summer one year. When I invited friends over to sit on my balcony, which has a lovely view of the ocean, each one in turn commented, “How can you stand those kids screaming?” I couldn’t use my balcony. Finally, I got up my nerve and began an over-the-fence conversation with my neighbor – who I have always liked – using all the courtesy I could muster after weeks on tranquillizers and on the verge of pulling my hair out, and told him, in a friendly manner, that the noise his 2- and 4-year old grandchildren made every day was, frankly, driving me crazy. He turned cold and said to me, “I don’t want to talk about it” and left. The kids kept it up and I called the police. Then I called the child welfare authorities. Hey, I could hear the kids scream, their mom chastise them, and then her smacking their bottoms CLEARLY from inside my house! They are an extremely vociferous family. Anyway, all that sort of worked but it made my neighbor angry. Finally, I was out pruning a hedge one day and the kids were running all over the yard next door, screaming at the top of their lungs – a series of long, drawn out screams – as usual – when I started screaming at the top of my lungs too. Here I am, up on a ladder at the top of a laurel hedge, screaming my guts out! Talk about therapeutic! Suddenly, I heard this voice, “Gale, are you alright?” It was the kids’ mom, sounding very concerned. She thought maybe I had cut my arm off with the pruning shears. I looked at her, totally relieved to see the look of genuine concern on her face, and said, “Now you know what it feels like.” With a look of compassion, she apologized. The kids were much quieter after that and now when they visit, they rarely make any noise. The other younger neighbors used to walk by and drive by and shout abusive comments at me, for no reason. Later it was in the local newspaper that one of them was arrested for possession of a firearm for the purpose of committing a crime and their best friend was arrested for physically assaulting a cab driver and damaging the cab in an angry outburst. I suffered two years of daily ongoing abuse from these bullies with no help from the police. The police said they had to be present at my house while I wrote a letter of complaint outlining all the incidents perpetrated against me by these young morons. It took me 2.5 hours to write it out by hand. Being a softie DOES NOT WORK. You have to be proactive with bad neighbors. Sadly, there is no other way. This younger generation is, in general and for the most part, a generation raised with no discipline or religion and very little moral guidance. Busy parents leave the parenting to teachers. Most parents are not very good parents and only care about spoiling their children, not teaching their children to be good citizens and courteous and kind to other people. This era of youngsters is an era that was raised to be wary of strangers, not to talk to adults, to be frightened of adults and, as a result, they treat adults with disrespect. My era was raised to be courteous to strangers, to treat adults and others with respect. Society is devolving. It’s the fault of today’s parents.
PS – My city developed a “Good Neighbor Bylaw” which covers all kinds of annoyances between neighbors which reduce your enjoyment of your property and aren’t covered by other bylaws. For example, your neighbor has a bright exterior light which is left on and shines into your house at night. Bylaw officers attend – not the police. It works!
One thing I found is that, if a kid screams at the top of its lungs all day long creating a disturbance, the police say well, it’s a kid. If an adult does it, they can be charged with creating a disturbance. That is, legally, discrimination. Are parents raising human beings, or animals these days?
Neighbor: I WOULD LOVE to have a “good neighbor bylaw”.. considering our neighbor is completely paranoid and belongs in a crazy house…and has several cameras pointed at our driveway, bathroom and bedroom windows as well as a ton of big solar lights that point directly at our driveway/yard. I have the right to have a dark driveway I say.. I do not need my neighbor to light the way or watch me as I take a shit in my bathroom or sleep with my hubby in my bedroom or watch my children as they play in my backyard.. These types of people have nothing to do (usually retired old people do this) and so it has made my life hell.. I would love to have this bylaw.. because let’s face it; HOA’s don’t do jack shit to help neighbors be kind neighbors about property issues.
Maggie McFarland: We are in an upscale coastal community (Corona del Mar, CA.) Our neighbor has complained virtuallly every time our son and his friends go out in the alley to play (which is rare). These are good boys 12 and 13. The neighbor is worried they will wake his babies in the middle of the afternoon etc. We own our whole lot street to alley, he owns 1/2 lot in the rear. He keeps telling them to go to the park, etc. I have asked him to leave the boys alone and call the parents, left our phone numbers, etc. I am thinking of filing some kind of harassment suit, restraining order, etc. Please advise, these really are good kids.
JG: It’s funny you say that…I used to work as a lifeguard at an indoor pool. The job was exeedingly boring, even for the short 4 hour shifts. The only thing we had was a small radio. We kept the volume on something like 1 out of 100. Needless to say, it was very quiet.
Every day, an elderly gentleman would come in to swim. He would walk by me, smile and turn down the radio. He would then proceed to put his swimming cap on, over his ears, and then swim with his head under the water. I would then turn the radio back up and he would never notice.
My point here is that everyone has different sensitivity to sound. Although, this guy was a little extreme.
I have an idea for your case. Go talk to your neighbor. It seems like he is sensitive as well. Go sit with him in his house while the kids are playing in the alley. Maybe he is hearing something from where he is that you can’t hear from you are. He is also worried about his child. He must have heard something at some point, or else he wouldn’t have even known the kids were there. Maybe you are so used to the noise that children make that you can’t even hear it anymore. Quiet to you may be loud to everyone else.
Also, you might want to tell the kids to play in the park where it is ok to yell all day long. (if they are even yelling)
Kathryn: My neighbor’s kids have been throwing things in my yard for approx. six years. They are up-hill so a full bottle of water, a beer bottle,or a metal tipped arrow have quite a force when landing on my patio or roof. I have talked to the mother 4 or 5 times, nothing changes. There is always a few months in between each attack. What to do?
ceedeekay: Sounds like our neighbors. When one of their triplets was 8, he threw a bottle of rocks into our yard and almost hit our dog. When the mother was confronted she said “boys will be boys!”
JG: Next time they make a mess, call the parents and have them come down with the kids to clean it up. That will hopefully eventually train these people that they will have to clean up their own mess.
Jason: My neighbors shoot a slingshot with marbles for fun. I find them everyday.
Meth head neighbors. By the way I blew the snow for many years so they could get out of the drive way. Always money for drugs.
Guia: I am also affected by disrespectful neighbors who leave large bulky items of garbage in the alley behind my house. This alley is the only access I have to my parking garage, and sometimes the garbage completely blocks the passage. I completely f#%ed my car up by accidentally backing over a toilet last year while pulling out of my drive way; It’s totally crazy. But nevertheless, I always opted for being the bigger person and not creating trouble. I had the city of Los Angeles sanitation bureau send me informative fliers for how to properly dispose of trash. These fliers had phone numbers for drop off centers, and even phone numbers for scheduling curbside pickups. I patiently plastered the entire alley with these fliers, written in both Spanish and English. Hoping people would get the hint. NO SUCH LUCK.
Today as I was backing out of my driveway, I actually was lucky/unlucky enough to spot an offender practically emptying the entire contents of his house in the alley. I politely walked up to him and gave him a flier, and attempted to explain how he didn’t need to dump his bulky trash in the alley, but could schedule a pick up FREE OF COST . He thanked me, and said he would call the city sometime this week. And proceeded to dump more garbage. I went into my home, and wondered how long the trash would stay there. I imaged homeless people grabbing mattresses and barricading under my carport. Tomorrow it would rain, and the piles of rags would fester. I imagined myself hauling the trash to the front of my own property, and properly scheduling a city sanitation pickup as they only pick up curbside trash, and even if the offender did call them, they wouldn’t pick it up in the alley anyway. God!!! this was going to be a night mare. I have had it! I stormed back out into the alley, and rambled some pseudo Spanish about “no more trash. ENOUGH” and demanded they haul it back into their home, and brought it to a city dump or scheduled a proper pick up AS INSTRUCTED ON THE FLIER! I brought out my digital camera, took photos, and said I would report it. I got serous!
Tomorrow we will see what happens. But do I feel good about it. Hell no! I feel terrible, now my neighbors hate me, and you should have seen the confused look on their face when I went crazy on them. I feel terrible I have been crying all day!!! WHAT COULD I DO??? I have been trying the nice approach for 5 years.
Brad: I too also have disrespectful neighbor’s. When they first moved on next door. I tried to do the whole nice guy neighbor thing by shoveling out their sidewalk and driveway for free. And all I ask nicely of them was to keep their dog’s in their yard
Low and behold their dog’s have been invading my property. Two day’s ago a friend of there’s had the nerve to pull up in my drive way and park on my platform. I went to confront them. And all they said was sorry
And then left laughing. Then just recently today another friend of theirs pulled up on the other side on my house. And they were eyeing me and my back yard. I asked them to stop doing that But I can hear them smarting off from inside their house. Help!
Vanessa: I have a really horrible neighbor who constantly parks his ratty old car in front of my house. It wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t park it there 24 7 for weeks at a time. I have no place else to park but in front of my house because the other neighbors use the other parking spots in front of their houses. This man has a huge driveway as well as 3 cars! He used to keep it parked in his driveway but now its on the street. And the car he uses everyday doesn’t even get parked any further up the driveway! He also cleared the snow by his walk so he could park the thrid on the grass! Also his stupid garage is actually built over the property line onto our property!I am at my wits end with this man and I don’t know what’s left to do. Is it possible to pay to have his car towed if I pay for it? Is it against the law to park on your front lawn? What can I do ?? Help needed!!
Dennis: I had a guy park his RV in front of my house. I asked him to move and he told me it was a free country! So I went and got a baseball bat and broke out every window in the coach. He called the cops. I had to pay a 250 dollar fine, but the guy never came back, and no one has parked in front of my house from that point on. Money well spent.
JG: I’m sure there’s some reason that tells me I’m supposed to say that what you did was wrong, but honestly, I think you are my new hero.
Suzanne: Well, check with City Hall in your area and usually there are By-Laws. If he is parked more than 24 hr period, he’ll receive a ticket.
She’s a Lunatic: Vanessa: Have it towed. There is not a court in the world that will not agree with you, and you are perfectly within your rights to do this, especially if he has a driveway that he should be using.
Tow him. Let the local police know that you are having the car towed.
If it’s a nasty old car, many cities have ordinances against junky vehicles on the street. Look into that.
I live next door to a real moron. Her weapon is wind chimes. Big, huge, honking wind chimes hung within ten feet of our house.
We tried to talk with her about them, and why they were a problem for us with their constant clankity clank clanking…not once, not twice, not three times, but on FOUR separate occasions. She would never deign to give us an audience, instead having her moron boyfriend (who, incidentally, I have caught on a number of occasions perving in our windows) or two rat-faced sons speak to us instead.
We wrote her a letter, telling her that litigation is in the works if she doesn’t knock this off. She ignored it.
We took her to court, suing for harassment, only to be told that we must sue her in a higher court for Maintaining a Nuisance. That’s where we are today.
I have a disability that makes the sound of the chimes intolerable, FYI.
Now we are gearing up for another lawsuit. What a shame that she is such an inconsiderate moron. She was always very rude to us from the beginning, and has a reputation in our neighborhood for being a lunatic, but we always tried to be good neighbors to her. Always.
I agree with the others…there is only so much that you can be “Zen” about.
Lori: i am so angry with my neighbor she has 3 kids a 12 year old 10 year old and a 3 year old the police have been called alot on this women she uses drugs and she is on housing so basicely its free living just yesterday her 3 year old came in our yard and picked up our rack and scratched our bran new 2007 otima where was the mother ill tell you what im going to do im going to take her to court these kids i feel sorry for them that they have a mother like that
these kids dont even go to school everyday because there mother is dopped up i have had it and im not going to be nice about it no more i have delt with these people for 7 years
Cheryl: I HAVE 3 CLICKY SETS OF NEIGHBORS.I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH ANY OF THEM.Ten of them live in a one family dwelling. They are white trash.KIDS screaming 24/7. We can’t sit in any room of our house. She’s been told to take care of her kids. Their in everyone’s yard, but suppose to be her kids. If I wanted to adopt somemore I would have.Then across is the MAYORS house . [77 YR. OLD]She watches us all day from 8 to 11 at her kitchen table staring at “EVERYTHING YOU DO”. They’ve worn out 3 sets of kitchen chairs in 6 yrs. Then their is Miss know it all ,next door. They are trying to get us out of the neighborhood. HARRSSING US.These people should be arrestedf or trying to destroy peoples lifes. We work and mind our own business.not moving!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Deana: I had a neighbor who’s god bit my wife while I was away on business. My wife did not want to make a big deal of it, so she did not call the police, but did go to the doctor and get the bit wound taken care of. Me, when I arrived back home, I went and knocked on his door and stated “I don’t want any trouble with the neighbors, however, you must keep your dog tied up. If I see the dog loose, I will call the Sheriff’s Department. If I see the dog in my yard, I will shoot it because I have two young children and your dog is a menace.”
He said “Okay.”
I said “Have a nice day.”
My “speak softly by carry a large caliber rifle” method of neighborhood diplomacy.
JG: I like that story…it sounds strangely familiar. Hmmmm.
Kevin Collins: My wife and I moved into our home a year and a half ago, we have five teenaged children. Shortly after we moved in I was grilled by one of the neighbors who lives next door. He wanted to know what I did for a living, and how much money I made. He said he likes to keep tabs on who lives next door. He and his wife later found out that three of our children were adopted and the other two were foster kids. From that time till now we have had nothing but trouble from them. They told me we had too many kids, and that foster kids were nothing but trouble. They constantly call the police on my children and blatantly lie in an effort to get us in trouble. Each time the police come out they tell us that we are not commiting any crimes and that dislike it but they have to come. For the last three weeks every time my children go into the backyard to play the neighbors call the police. Officer Humble just left about thirty minutes ago. Wouldn’t you know it he is the nephew to the complaintant. He got a private call and said my kids were making lewd gestures toward the neighbors (his uncle and aunt). I was sitting out there the whole time and the kids never even looked their way. They have an eight foot privacy fence so how could they even see them? The harassment goes on and on. I have tried talking to them, I have even put the police dog I retired with to sleep because she was afraid of German Shepherds. Even though the dog was kept in a kennel and was behind a privacy fence and atleast 100 yards from her house. I have bent over backwards trying to just have a little peace.
All I want is peace, but nothing I do is enough. The code enforcement officer was called out today and he told me we weren’t in violation of anything and that these neighbors were trouble makers. He suggested that we hire an attorney and have the attorney send them a cease and desist letter which we did today.
one of my kids was sitting in our front yard star gazing the other night when the neighbor walked by and asked him what he was doing. when he told he was watching stars she told him that FOSTER KIDS shouldn’t be outside after dark. What does being a foster kid have to do with anything?
We just signed the contract to buy the house three weeks ago and now I am wishing we hadn’t..
What makes it worse is that I am a minister in this town and I am trying to keep the right spirit. But it is hard.
I don’t want revenge I just want peace. It seems the only way to get it is to move. But I hate this constant turmoil.T
Sincerely seeking Peace The Rev.
Disgusted With Hand-Wringing, Spineless Weaklings: You had your dog put to sleep because the NEIGHBOR was “afraid of it”??! You couldn’t come up with anything better than THAT?! Despite having an 8 foot fence around your property and having the dog locked in a kennel on top of it, the lady was so terrified that you so courteously did the neighborly thing and got rid of the dog.
Maybe if you hadn’t caved in to your neighbors over things that you should have NEVER caved on, they wouldn’t feel that they can lord it over you with other things. Because that’s the WORST reason I’ve ever heard of someone putting an animal “to sleep”.
Jason: Why would you put down a healthy dog. Because of neighbors. Would like putting down on of my kids.
Allison Klusmann: I think I just need to vent, and welcome any advice because I am about to lose it.
My neighbors do not take care of their yard. They let the weeds grow as tall as the house, their “tomato” garden that backs up to my yard rot and overgrow with weeds which is now causing moss, fungus and my grass to die. Not to mention all the unpleasant bugs it brings. They have installed retaining walls and pebble grounds, which also back up to my yard (divided by a picket fence) and pavers underneath their air conditioning unit (therefore there is no ground underneath the drip to absorb the water, which then rolls off into my yard causing more moss and flooding). They do not trim their trees, edge around the inside or outside of their fence, blow or sweep up the clippings in the sidewalk after the rare mow or two, called me in the middle of knowing i was throwing a baby shower multiple times, repeatedly, until i answered to tell me to have my guests that are parked in front of their house to move their cars b/c he “might be expecting a package” and he “might want to morter in the stones around his trees” even though it was POURING DOWN RAIN, and the fact that he called the cops on another neighbor b/c the charter bus that was loading the guests was temporarily parked in front of their house. There are other issues, but I do not have the energy to type them all. I am frustrated, and don’t know what to do other than to politely ask them each time for help. Well, I did that yesterday over email b/c the actual homeowner works out of town Mon-Thursday and his boyfriend who is not a homeowner doesn’t work in the yard. After reading my polite email, they got defensive, starting name calling and being immature. I sent several emails back explaining that my email must have been misinterpreted and actually apologizing for nothing, but tyring to avoid confilict, but they kept up with the name calling and immature behavior. Here’s a clip for your viewing pleasure: “Wow, I have tryed to be neighborly about this but clearly you can not behave like an adult, best of luck with Jim and Mr. Love. For the record it has been your combative nature that has elevated this absolutly ridiculous issue into bad feelings. I refuse to lower myself to the petty, childish, hatefull behavior you have exhibited. I not only don’t have the time, or energy, and in fact to much respect for myself to do so.” This was after numerous emails of him avoiding the issue and picking fights. All I asked was them to help, and once they got out of hand, I told them that I was going to pass along the issue to the neighborhood management company. This was his response to that. I have been worrying and worrying over the fact that I may have come off the wrong way b/c you can’t read tone in an email, but nobody else (including the management company) thinks that’s the case. So, I’m left wondering if they are going to poison my dog or something. I wish these childish boys would grow up and accept the responsibilities of homeownership.
Chaundra: you know that is not at all the advice i would give but whatever! first of all the neighbors i have are just flat out disrespectful drunks that do not care that there is someone else living under them. There are 3 apartments here mine is the lowest then the 2nd and the third the 2nd apart. had a girl and guy that just moved last month their cousin lives on the 3rd floor and when the 2nd floor moved the aunt moved in the mother of the guy on 3rd floor and they are all the same. when we first moved in a year ago the 2nd and 3rd floor did nothing but slam the front door so hard and on purpose to the point where all my pictures on my wall are broke i cannot have nothing on my shelves bc they knock them off the landlord finally fixed the door where they couldnt slam it anymore but then to retaliate against that they got a dog and let their dog pee on the back porch and it drips down on to our porch, how disgusting is that they never once took their dog outside, finally they got rid of it, but the 3rd floor all he does is beats his girlfriend and she moves all of her stuff out every week then moves it all back in the next week and every time she leaves all her stuff all over the place in front of our door there is like a common area and they think they live throughout the entire house even though their apartment is only the 3rd floor. the stuff stinks like mildew and pee from their kids, so now the 2nd floor moves out and the lady moves in with her dog and now she is letting her dog pee on her porch which then the pee comes down on my porch and it smells so bad like pee on my porch all of our stuff is out there and this is where we come in and out every single day and the landlord just says i will say something to them and when he did the lady says i have never once had my dog on that porch what a liar she is?? i cant believe she is gonna flat out lie ok if she hasnt been letting her dog pee all over then why does it smell like pee and why has your dog not one time been outside you have not walked your dog down these stairs one time and let him out, and you are calling my neighbor a liar and me a liar I have seen your dog pee and so has my neighbor and the sad thing is the landlord says well why dont you move then??? who says that to someone that has always paid rent and has always been a good tenant but when someone is being disrespectful that is one of your tenants you will do nothing but say something take action and be a landlord instead of a scum lord on top of not making the drunks stop he wont fix anything in this place we blow fuses everyday all day and night, the electrical outlets catch on fire and melt plugs and when the 2nd floor called the fire marshall he thought it was us and threatened to evict us but knows he couldnt because we have done nothing wrong, it just shows you what kind of person he is! well what advice do you have when you have neighbors that do this stuff. it has nothing to do with not wanting to sit down and have a cup of tea or stuff like that, it has to do with dealing with disrespectful people that you have never even had any interaction with in your life. they are just naturally disgusting drunk disrespectful rotten people how do you deal with those people in life when you have to live next to them. and believe me we are out of here soon!
Jessica: Last summer I rented a beautiful 950sq. ft. apartment located right down town in a small village community. My son and I were just elated to snatch it up. There just 2 other units next to mine and we are on the 2nd floor above several businesses. We have been here now for 6 months and my son attends the best school district in the state. Well needless to say things were fine until 3 mos. ago when my drunken neighbor let his brother move in along with a huge dog all cramped in a tiny 1 bedroom unit. Then the problems began his brother drinks whiskey and is mean. I am harassed every time I leave my apt. as this guy has to open his door and call me a snobby. It kept getting worse then he beat his brother up and his brother came to use my phone then left. Well I had a friend stop by and we were in the den and my neighbor walked in my place without knocking the creepy thing is he did it as quietly as a church mouse and startled us. I told him leave and not to ever walk into my home uninvited again. he kept doing it every day. My son and I had to keep the door locked at all times. then he’d pound on my door wanting to borrow this then that then this and that. 2 weeks of this was wearing on me. If we forgot to lock the door in mid day he would sneak in and steal my bottle returns to buy beer. My son had $40 he put on the microwave not thinking. (We are not accustomed to people sneaking in our home to steal from us for alcohol) Then my son’s house keys vanished so I changed the locks. Now late at night I notice different cars pull up front neighbor”s brother runs out a second later I hear him come back upstairs. By the 3rd time of doing this I caught on. Great now I have alcoholic next to me. Well my breaking point came when my son informed me my neighbor’s bro came over and wanted a game so my kid did it to get rid of him since I was not home. I got home got a shower walked out in my towel and I screamed there was my neighbor. I ran to my room dressed in record time came out and he’s taking my cigarettes well I went to grab them and he broke them and I lost it yelling for him to get out and he kicked my solid oak coffee table so hard into my knees a knob to the drawer broke and the ash tray flew all over the floor my crystal bowl of dried flowers were now scattered every where. I snapped and tackled him on the sofa gfot him in a head lock and punched the living out of him. I finally got it together and got away from him when he started to lunge at me just then walks in my friend Joe and my son and they grab him and throw him out the door and lock it. I wasted no time and was granted a PPO against him and his sadistic brother.
I have everything documented with local police who informed me that back in Oct. another officer arrested my neighbor for possessing. I googled it and printed the liitle news article out. I have a complaint on file with police and a protection order now as further proof to copy and give to my landlord in hopes he will finally do something to insure my son and mine’s safety and right to enjoyment and peace I l9ost 3 mos. ago.
What if my landlord does nothing? What right’s do I have?
Jonbonjovi: My next door neighbors are very special, I’ve had a war of silence going on with them since january 2011. I believe 5 to 6 people are sharing one house and I live in yuppy suburbia paradise, and I haven’t spoken a single word to them just to drive them crazy because they really creep me out. This lady reminds me of godzilla, screaming at the top of her lungs at 8:00am or 10:00pm, I had to move back home with my father for medical reasons and have been living with chronic pain for a long time, and there is nothing worse than a neighbor who watches from the dark recesses of they’re “porch” and judges you during the quiet of the night, and the funniest part is overhearing them talking about what they have seen you do. Its pretty creepy, and I guess its turned into some form of entertainment for them. They are entertained by my misfortune! My form of protest to encourage these people to “prosper” somewhere else and not go from renters to owners of the property: put on a show for them (for instance they have been trained to think that every time I turn on my laptop to watch netflix in my living room I’m looking at or something like that, because I screw with them and adjust the blinds a bit or mess with the lights. freakiest part is I literally hear them say this to they’re so called friends who are visiting, “o, the neighbor is looking at again…” when I turn my laptop on in my living room hehe). Also, hanging a sign in the window for a short duration that says “take a picture, it will last longer. Stupid yuppies!” with a unhappy smiley face is enough to get anybodys dogs barking! I sense they are people who like to be in control of things. So, to just really piss them off I don’t do any yard work, let the weeds take over, and the leaves pile up. They are loud, condescending, arrogant, obnoxious, and truly inconsiderate egotistical rich folk. I know I hit a soft spot somewhere cause I heard the father who lives over there talking on the phone about how the only problem living in this neighborhood was me! Does that make me the bad neighbor? Even if I’m just trying to mind my own business, appreciate peace and quiet, and get on with my life? My sense regarding what they want from me, don’t know, haven’t really done anything to piss them off other than my forms of protesting and things I think are funny. So if I speak to them, doesn’t that mean I lost the war of silence? Will my pride crumble? I don’t think they have anything good to say, I’ve already over heard enough to know what they think of me and once people judge you they seal the deal. Especially if they paint your entire life in black and white, as if they know who you really are (even though they are just who like to watch and feel rejected and shocked cause I dont want to talk to them because I don’t like being watched). I guess thats my big theory about why american communities are always going to have social unrest and chaos. What should I do, just ignore them?
Iam: My point is some people are just plain idiots. They have no common sense and don’t care about anything but themselves. I bought my house 18 years ago and then a drunken, drug using couple bought the house next door to me last year. The couple who lived there but passed away were OK. The new couple are a work of art. To condense this, my biggest problem with them is a barking Chihuahua that is on a tether that comes right up to the property line. That dog gets put out at 6AM and barks at the first thing that moves. This is about 7 feet from my bedroom window which I havent opened in over a year. Then there is the issue of the police showing up at my house because he beats his wife. The husband works at a carwash making $9 per hour but has rich parents. The wife drives a roach coach 2 days a week. The parents bought the house for their kid to get him and his wife out of theirs. The wife is of mexican heritage and grew up in a very bad town and has a bad attutude. Ripped ear lobes, a crooked nose from having it broken-she has been beat on her entire life. Her mother watches their child and just lets the dog bark and bark for hours and does not speak English. His mother is a social drunk and his father is a branch manager of a bank.
I went over there and spoke to him nicely about the dog. He accused me of threating him and ran into the house. That makes me look like the bad guy. I never raised my voice or threatened him in anyway. He used that as an excuse to make me look like the instigator. I talked to a attorney who said it a common ploy. Turn you into the bad guy. They live in the corner house and and there are plenty of places to put the dog where it won’t be barking at everyone who wants to work in their front yards or walk down the street, next to my house. I have many neighbors ask me to talk to them and I tell them I have tried. I say to them we could get a petition going or you could talk to them yourselves. Nobody wants to get involved. Basically what I have is a spoiled idiot who is in his mid 30′s with rich drunk parents who pay for everything. These two couldn’t afford the ultilites let alone the mortgage and make the whole area a nightmare. Two weeks ago I had the police show up at my house because he hit his wife while he was drunk. The police grabbed me the second I opened my front door and then realized the problem was next door. I was not amused. They apologized. Since I got roughed up for no reason I figured they owed me one. I asked about all the BS going on next door and their reply was “we can talk to them but without your neighbors backing you up, you are screwed. Their advice was to hire an attorney and fight it out in court. Really? The police and the towns animal control are usless in my case. They don’t want to get involved in what they consider a civil matter. To sum this up, yes I remember how much noise I made when I was a kid. I remember one of my friends having a German Shepard who barked at everyone because it lived outside most of the year. On the other hand I have worked too hard for 28 years just to have some spoiled drunks act like well, spoiled drunks. I don’t intend on taking this court because after 18 years I have been looking for a home with a NEIGHBORHOOD anyway. Do you realize what is like to have a little mutt barking all the time? It causes stress in your house. By the way, this is an upscale area and his peoples parents put way too much money into that house. I on the other hand bought cheap and am willing to sell cheap because I can. They can then figure out what they can do with a house that they have roughly 600k into thats worth about 300k. I paid 165k 18 years ago and it’s time to move on. Sometimes people are just going to be idiots and that is that. If I loved my house and block I would fight in court. With my other neighbors showing their true colors (lets water the flowers at 11 PM to avoid any confrontation), they deserve what they get. I have a friend who knows a realtor who owns a bunch of section 8 properties. If he makes me a good offer, he gets the house. I really don’t care but let’s see how many people complain about that. I’m 45 years old and have saved up well into 7 figures. 50 or 100k less for my house really isn’t going to hurt me at all. In 18 years this place has never been a neighborhood and I look at the house as a commidity. One that it’s time to get rid of. I’ll still make money and they will have what they deserve. QOUTE ” For your reference, you can’t change a bad neighbor. You have to get away from them and leave them for other people to deal with.” is the best advice from the ADMIN on this post. You are not going to change these people. I could take this guy down to the ground in thirty seconds but who gets in trouble if beat him down? ME and it’s not worth losing everything I worked for all these years. I’m moving and I hope the new owner rents to scum. When you stoop to their level don’t be suprised if YOU end up in jail or with a judgement against you. There are people who know how to play the system and I’ve got them next door. Doing stupid things is just going to get you into trouble. Liquid Ass, threatening people with guns? Really you would possibly go to jail or got shot by the police. It happened here two months ago to a woman who was pointing a gun at her neighbor. Are you willing to die because of some idiots? They want you to get worked up and do something stupid. Like I said you can’t change them and alot of them know how to play the system. I’ll just move- Thanks.
Wayne: I would really like to think that some people are open to discussing their bad habits — but in this world of great selfishness, I’ve stopped believing it’s possible. Once, when I very politely asked the man in the apartment above me to stop making noise at 3 am, he poured a type of chemical hardener down his bathtub drain which essentially blocked my tub drain and his. He was kicked out — and I had my bathroom renovated. It took a month. I’ve endured hours and hours of “home of the handyman” in this building — drilling, sawing, hammering at all hours. Property management just keeps saying the same thing: “Call the police” or “Keep a noise diary so we have the proof we need to evict.” Always on my shoulders to do something. People live communally but refuse to recognize they have neighbours — and refuse to accept the fact that they do need to give some consideration to others.
JG: Hi Wayne – Sometimes the only way to find true peace is to make it a goal to pick up and move to the country. Find a way to do it. Get some land and live your life the way you’d like to live it. People will never change and having to put up with their misbehavior for the rest of your life is not going to make you very happy.
Mrs. B: Moving to the country doesn’t always help.
We retired to the country and our neighbor is “something else”, to put it nicely. I do feel sorry for her because she creates and lives in her own hell.
We are the bad neighbors with the animals getting on her property. However, we have bent over backwards and done all that we can to keep them from doing so. I’m here to tell you all that no one, not one person out there can do that 100% of the time. If our electric fence goes on the fritz & we don’t realize it we find out via the authorities that she calls.
She’s never comes over as a friendly neighbor to work anything out or acknowledge all the things we are doing, or even just say hey I think your fence isn’t working l, the animals are over here again.
Just 2 days ago we found out the fence wasn’t working not because she drove down her driveway to her gate not 5 feet from my husband & his friend working on our water pump, turned around(she didn’t go out her gate or roll her window down to tell them) & drove right back up. Low and behold not 30 minutes later her comes the authorities to tell them our animals were on her land. And the best part??? we can’t go get them because them we’d be trespassing. The trooper had to do it.
So, husbands been 2 days fixing fence(still didn’t know electric part wasn’t working until today) and you guessed it another visit today and a lovely $165.00 ticket and the trooper got to wrangler our animals again.
I am at my wits end, and so afraid to do anything for fear she’ll be calling again.
BTW, the animals are not the only thing she’s called about – how about the 2 feet we accidentally mowed of her 3-4 foot tall grass when making a turn too wide (by accident) with the riding lawnmower. Yes, the trooper came for that call too.
We just wanted a quiet retirement in the country, make friends, invite them over for dinner, help fix their fences or any other things, be a good neighbor and even just leave her alone if that’s the case. we have tried our best to accommodate her requests to the best of our ability to no avail. I wait every day for whatever other shoe is going to drop that day. I basically live in fear all the time everyday. I’m even afraid to get my mail from the mailbox as she’s accused us of damaging hers.
My husband is a disabled vet from every conflict from Vietnam to Afghanistan and just wanted to quietly retire on his dream property and I am a mental wreck all the time and let’s just leave it at that and thank you all for letting me vent.
Nunya: I do not have dogs nor do I have kids. I don’t play my music or television loud due to what’s called CONSIDERATION for others. Two of my neighbors have barking dogs (day and night) and one neighbor leaves his car running with the music so loud my house windows rattle. He does this a couple times a day/night. Sunday morning it was at 5 a.m. until I stood out in the driveway. The neighbor behind me has a 50 foot tree that constantly sheds into my pool, birds crap down MY fence, etc. It serves no purpose such as shade and it simply a mess. People are idiots. Common courtesy does NOT exist any more, it’s more like uncommon courtesy. I asked my neighbor not to leave his music on while parked in the driveway and he laughed at me. I wonder if he’ll think a nice fat fine for violating city noise ordinance is funny.
At the end of my rope: I know exactly how you feel. I have had my gutter torn down by m neighbor and then a complaint filed on my by the same neighbor. On top of that, I received a notice the other day saying I have too much snow on my property and that I have one week to clear my property of all snow and ice both on my driveway and my front and back yards. I am now in the process of trying to find a snow removal person to do that for me and it’s not easy with people need reasonable help with getting their driveways cleared so they can move their cars. I keep to my own doors and keep my doors close. I’m not a mean or vindictive person but honestly if something were to happen to their house I would probably throw a big block party just to be free of the oppression.
At the end of my rope: Here my neighbor issue. I have lived in my home since 1980 and over the past few years I have had to deal with complaints from my neighbors about stuff I don’t even do. First it was because my grass grew to 9 inches when my mower was out for repairs and no one would let me borrow one, then I had complaints because they tore my gutter down on one side of my house and then called in a complaint because I had no gutter on one side (hello you took it down). The latest is I have a few leaves in my driveway in a small (not even 10 inches in length) space from my back fence to my mower. As if that wasn’t bad enough, I now am not allowed to have chairs in my backyard or stacked neatly against the side of my house, my car is not allowed to be in my own driveway (not it’s not a shared but private driveway), and now I’m being told I can’t even have snow on my property. Yes I actually got a notice to remove all snow from my property within one week. Does anyone have a situation like that? By the way, they can have a fire pit, a water feature, plants all over the place and put their stuff against my house but I’m not allowed to say anything about it.
Neighbor: Ok. read the dumb blog up at top.. I really don’t care what the hell my neighbors do as long as it doesn’t directly affect me or my family.. HOWEVER; I do think that ignoring the issue only creates a worse situation for both neighbors.. but if you are like me and the neighbor (you do try to talk to simply ignores you) and keeps watching you with tons of lights and video cameras; what are you to do then?????
That is the hell I live in right now.. I have tried talking to the neighbor’s wife (she is the worst) and hubby (who is a cop in Travis County TEXAS) and still nothing.. they only get worse.. they have enough bright solar lights around their front yard to land a plane and at least a 1/2 dozen security cameras.
It all started about 4 years ago when they recently moved in.. a neighbor (they believe) hid behind one of my bushes and ran across the street when they came to pull up to their driveway.. Mind you that the women said she saw a dark figure (no face, nothing to identify this person) and the man was NOT with her.. She did NOT file a police report about it..
So after that she wanted me to tear down my bushes.. I said NO ( I worked very hard to have bushes! to have some privacy).. then next thing I know she has kids in the neighborhood start tearing up my bushes while she and her husband watched (mind you; he is a cop) which was witnessed by another neighbor. She went around the neighborhood telling people she pointed the finger of the mystery bush hider as a neighbor. She then told the whole neighborhood he was spying on her and watching her and was a bad guy. BTW: he is NOT and is a loving family man (known them for years!!!)
After that; it only got worse. Her son would throw big trashy parties at their home and then we would have stuff broken by our property between our homes in our front yard. So one summer we went on a long vacation. About 3 weeks. When we got back; a bunch of stuff weird that happened.. Our neighbor; who was watching/feeding our cats said our “crazy” neighbors parked the hubby’s police cruiser in our driveway the whole time! Some other weird stuff happened after that and so we decided; enough! We put up security cameras.
This pissed off our neighbor. NOT 1 of our cameras pointed at their home or yard! but then she got more paranoid! She then put up cameras after I told a neighbor I caught her walking her dog on a leash and walking into our yard (on side of our home) and letting the dog piss/shit in our yard while on a leash as she stood there with rollers in her hair… Really classy!
So now it has been over 4 years and they are still doing crazy shit and putting up soo many lights and cameras because the women believes now that WE are spying on them.. since the “bush” guy moved away that she thought was the one hiding in the bush..
I guess having a cop cruiser in your driveway day in and day out doesn’t keep the stalkers away.. I dunno but she thinks people are spying on her!.. she has pissed off a lot of our neighbors and I really wish we could move but we cannot. so what would you do.??? We had to put up lattice between our fences as they had cameras pointed into our bedroom and bathroom windows of our home.. all their cameras are pointed to the street and US- our driveway and home.. We have threatened to sue and they did move one camera but then replaced it with a big bright light pointed the same way as the camera was..directly at us!
I have NOT ever damaged their property or shit on their lawn with my pets or anything else.. I am not sure WHY we are being targeted so heavily. Why do I need to be surveillanced by a cops wife 24 / 7 and not allowed just privacy in my home.. I am a disabled vet (she is mad about me having handicapped tags too) because I am younger than her.. so all around she just hates my guts and nothing I say or do with change that.. I have major back problems/knee problems that make it tough to sit in a driving position for more than 30 mins.. so why am I being targeted????
Any ideas on how to annoy them enough that they will want to move ?? for good?? I really can’t take anymore of this type of STALKING AND HARASSING OF ME AND MY FAMILY!
UncleMan: If your pain in the ass neighbors have small children, that is your best target. Just scare the shit out of them so they fear going outside. *FUCM!
Krissy: I Have Neighbors That Has Their Garbage All Over Their House Next Door. & Their Bratty Kids Throwing Their Paper Plates Up against Our Cellar Side Door After They Are Done With Them. They Had Ketchup All Over My Door & On Our Siding. & I Had To Clean It Up. & They Also Had Their Garbage All Over The Place On Their Back Porch & Never Take It To Their Garbage Cans Up By The Alley Way. & Leaves It There For About A Month Or So. & I Always Have To Take It Up There For Them & Pick Up After Them. & I Have To Clean Up Around Here when Their Kids Don’t Pick Up Their Mess They Made Here. It Just Pisses Me Off. What Should I Do. I Am At The End Of My Rope.
Ruth: I am so fed up with my neighbors grandchildren too. Just good to hear about others. Prayers are my weapon.
JG: Hi Ruth – Unfortunately, you may need more than prayers in some situations. If I were you, I would start looking at options.
Shawwwwwn: Ok well this is my story. First of I am 26 y/o just moved out of my parents place. I am not a big party animal but like to have a few friends over to watch the game. I own my condo, and I expect that I have some rights as does the complaining neighbor.
So far I been living at the condo 2 weeks, never had a party or anyone over. Just go about my business. So yesterday I had friends over (5 of them) to watch the Packers vs Cowboys. We are drinking, talking, and cheering the game on. 10:30PM (thursday) my neighbor comes to my door, looking very annoyed. You guys are very loud I can hear you walking around, your tv is up too loud, and can you be quiet. I apoligize turn down the tv slighty, and go about just hanging with friends. 11:00pm The guy comes back you guys are still loud this is the last time I am coming back. Come on I mean we talk a bit loud and joke around, but you know what I have rights too. I mean eventually I am gonna have my parents over and friends for a house warming, I am not buying a place to tip toe around and not have people over. I am not a d*ck but some people are just anal, and want total silence, and if you want that get a house don’t live in a condo.
Linda: Boy, are you so very off. I live in an apartment above my troublesome neighbor. She is definitely younger than I am. You want to talk about troublesome… Ok, the night she came and took over the apartment below mine, she yelled a the woman who was moving out. Then commenced to yell at me upstairs. She hasn’t quit, even when the owner told her to stop and leave.
She demands I clean so she can yell and scream, telling me I am doing it wrong, I am her slave and have to do it her way, including childish and cruel names. She also demands I move because I won’t do what she wants. She has also tried to have me arrested on false charges of thievery and being a pedofile.
She also demands my personal property and thinks she can tell me what I can and can’t keep, eat, wear…etc. As though she really believes she can run my life for me.
The cops have been called on her and admittedly me for our yelling back and forth. Yes, I have read her the riot act a few times, reminding her that she is the one who has to shut up, clean up her act and go home to her parents since she wants to act like a 2 year old instead of a responsible adult.
What really gets me is that the owner won’t throw her out, unless, that is, he evicts me first for HER brat bitch behavior. I am at my wits end, but I refuse to give her the power over me that will encourage her to keep this up. I will NOT move, I will NOT clean and I will NOT do anything she tells me to do.
Now, will someone please come with the straight jacket and butterfly net to remove her from my life so she can get the medical and medicinal help she needs to see reality and do the right thing by going home to her parents?
Anders: your advice in this article doesn’t cut it. sometimes you make no noise yourself, are respectful, and all you get back from your neighbors is rude noise, attitude, and strife.
Martinicat: I can understand about the festering thing. However, we live in a planned community where just about everyone is a great neighbor. Except for…well, let’s just call them, the McDoes. This old couple, who my husband and I were friendly with initially – we gave them tomatoes from our garden and dog pee pads when our dog got house trained, etc, etc – then, they turned. We are friendly with everyone and don’t get involved in neighborhood politics. The McDoes noticed we were friendly with some people who are suing them (the McDoes and for good reason). Now, they have started some sort of sick, twisted routine of intimidation. Anyone who disagrees with them or does anything (I’m talking trivial stuff, like doesn’t clip their grass 1/4 of an inch within the limit they think it needs to be clipped – I’m not exaggerating) they don’t like, the McDoes call the police and say that the person is harassing them (the McDoes).
I understand about wanting your neighbors to call the fire department for you. In fact, many of us in the neighborhood have an emergency smore making kit. If the McDoes house ever did catch fire, we would roast marshmallows, make smores and sing kumbaya.
JG: Has anyone noticed that the people who leave comments on this post are a little…um…shall we say…oh, forget it.
Lynn: I have never lived next to a good neighbor EVER. Why should this neighbor be any different? well here it goes: i live in a city full of bad neighbors, drug dealers, users, trash and so on, well my new next door neighbor is a single guy and i thought ok well this should be better than my last neighbors. WRONG! He plays his music loud everyday, somtimes for just a half hour or so… which doesnt bother me. But other times he plays it when im trying to get my kids to bed. Mind you i have 3 small children and im 9 months pregnant. I have asked him at least 6 times to keep it down, i always was polite and told him what a good neighbor he was and that i just had an issue with his music… well he totally ignored me and nothing has changed since i moved in about 4 months ago. I finally got fed up with asking him and being nice since he obviously wasnt getting the point of KEEP it down. My kids couldnt sleep at night and would wake up crying so i had to do something about it asap. So i asked him one more time and said i wouldnt ask him again to turn it down because i asked him a dozen times already. He said ok and was polite back as always but then continued to be loud. He seems to have gotten even more bold, having a dog in his house when no pets are allowed, having people over at night and being loud, playing loud music ect… so i called the landlord to complain and now he is pissed off at me, i am just trying to get his noise level down before i have this baby and he being a single guy doesnt understand the need for quiet when you have kids that need naps and go to bed early. I always yell at my kids to be quiet and would never let them or myself be that noisey but yet i have to hear his noise UGH! today he came to my door pounding and asking to speak with me, i assume he got a call from my landlord today to keep it down because i complaind. He seemed very upset and has been slamming his doors ect… what should i do? should i go talk to him? or just stay away from him? Im afraid he will retailiate or have someone else harm me? am i overreacting? any input ty!!
Rob: Lynn – I totally sympathize. My family and I are going through a similar situation with a neighbor that has been living next door for 9 months. All nine of those months have been a major irritant to me. He is a renter and I own my property. I did the polite thing and went over to his place two times and my wife, once. After that it was all HOA. I did the right thing by bringing it up, but I would have worn out a path between my front door and his if I had gone over there every time his “surround-sound” was turned up. We share an adjoining wall for our Town home units.
This “tenant” ignored all the violations sent to him, every one of them. He continued his trashy behavior untill enough complaints were made and a hearing was called by the HOA. They are better now, but I don’t trust them and I don’t wish to live next to them much longer. I have my own meeting with the HOA and the landlord coming up in the near future and I am going to suggest, one owner to another, that they not renew this renters lease. As far as I could tell the tenant hasn’t been brought to task for the last nine months of crap and I am going to retain a lawyer if I can’t get what I want from the homeowner next door, i.e., a promise to evict.
I will not have a good relationship with this guy and his miriad family/friends who live with him. I get the ugliest of looks from him and I don’t feel comfortable in my own living space any longer. I have only for a short time, 3 years, next to good neighbors. Rest of the time, most have been rude and/or violent. We lack civility in our society. It has been gone for many years.
Diana: I Had a neighboe’s son from heck. He tormented my children, threw trash in my yard, cut my telephone line, destroyed my childrens toys in the backyard including their swingset. I reasoned everthing out because there is some type of logic to the madness. I thought it would stop. When He got old enough to drive, then he and his friends parked their cars inbetween our houses and turned the base on full blast. Yes my house was vibrating and my windows were rattling. I asked him to turn it down, it took four times screaming at the top of my lungs to get his attention. I only got it because he looked in my direction. and yes I was even stupid enough to explain I couldn’t hear my phone ring. For three months he got worse because I told him to turn it down. His base blasted everyday, then three times a day. Talking to the mom was a nightmare. She told me to quit picking on her son. So I called the police. Yep world war three, He tried to run me over with his car. I, being the idiot, talked to his mother again. She raked me over the coals for calling the police about the loud base and how I better leave her son alone..This 19 year old jerk said yea mom she’s crazy. I let them finish…MY TURN I called the police only twice and only complained about her son three times in eight years. I had enough I wasn’t planning to put him in jail but under it. Every time he breaks the law I’ll call the cops on him and his friends 911 tapes prove he’s been a nightmare..ect… I though the neighbors would never come around me for my outburst but I found out their nextdoor neighbor of 3 years who is disabled shot off his 45 (it was blanks but they still make noise) to make sure the whole house holdheard him, because he couldn’t yell over the base. The whole block called in to the police. I was never alone. No one wants to cause trouble but these jerks like him know that and treat you like dirt because your a coward and afraid of them, that’s what they think. So much for good manners right. I have no more problems except I know if I would have stood up in the first place things wouldn’t have got so out of hand. Don’t let things build up, Try to talk it out. One rasied voice say it’s your problem solve it, walk off, no matter what. Then wait a few days if the behavior continues and get some help. Talk to your neighbors, city council, mayor, and or police.
Getreal1: Writer, You need to get into the 21st century and see what really happens in ALL neighborhoods now instead of dispensing marshmallow advice. It’s pretty apparent you haven’t had to live in the real world, at least not recently. Most neighbors may not be mean, but since neighbors rarely speak to each other it’s hard to tell. I would never try to talk or reason with them if there’s a chance they have a lab and there’s always a great chance they could be, no matter what kind of neigborhood you live in, in which case rationality is not going to have any inroads with them. This is not the 1950′s. Back then, some (not all) neighbors could be trusted and were decent because if they weren’t, they were ostrasized. Now when they are bad (and dangerous) neighbors can sometimes have a gang of friends who are readily availale to intimidate and/or do injury to a neighbor or neighbors who complain or try to stand up for themselvs, and the police don’t want to mess with them because in suburbia they are not equipped for more than writing traffic tickets, and if you try to deal with them yourself there’s a good chance you or your property or both could be damaged badly! In larger neighborhoods police don’t have the time to deal with bad neighbors.
Brian: I started to read the above message but had to stop have way through. I have tried everything with my neighbors. I have personally walked up to them shook their hand and they were cool with everything and we would work together with the issues we were having. Well guess what? that didn’t work. These people dont care about anyone else, they are unemployed and live off the govt that I proudly work for. They sit on their front porch and drink all day and it doesnt matter what time of the day it is. So now back to the article I read. Nothing works. No one cares and that just way life is in this world today.
Diane: My 60ish neighbor whom has never moved out of mommys house, she is alive, is not nice! He got mad when my son,26, was shoveling my driveway and flipped some snow over the fence into his front yard. He threw a shovel full of snow in my sons face and then threatened to hit him with his shovel. My son put his shovel up in defense and accidentally clocked him. He then threatened to come over the fence and beat my son. My son told him to come on over. Well, he didnt but proceeded to shovel his yard into my driveway. Really? I told him to grow up and he proceeded to talk smack to my kid and to me til his sister came out to try and physically remove the shovel from him. He told her to back off and get away from him because he wasnt done and proceeded to shovel his yard of snow into my driveway. He is so immature. What do you do with someone like that. I told my son to step back and let him shovel his whole yard into our drive. Then his sister said they will take pictures of the snow so they know if we do it again!! OMG! They have been horrible neighbors to us for 20 years. They called the police on me last summer because I was powerwashing my fence with pure water and it was getting the side of their house wet. They called the police when my kids were little, playing in the sprinkler on a hot summer day and the water created a small puddle on their sidewalk in front of their house! These people are ridiculous.
The police are tired of them also, after 20 years of calling for petty things they told them last summer that they were no longer coming out and wasting their time. They were told if they dont like us thats fine, then they need to not speak to us. They basically told them to grow up.
The old man has been gone for 11 years and he was just as bad, if not worse. He told my kids when they were ages 6 to 11 that he was going to put barb wire on the fence so they would cut their hands up if they touched the fence. He walked right into my front door and put my 12 tear old son against a wall threatening bodily harm. He came into my yard one time and got into my face and I asked him to leave and he kept getting closer to me so I ran into the house and when I got in I looked out the window and he was still standing there and he kicked my dog in the chest and my dog bit his hand.
I guess the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree. I cant stand these people and wish I could build a 20 ft wall between my line and theirs.
I do not speak to them and avoid them it’s just the stuff they do all the time to us. We keep our home nice inside and outside. Their house is kinda dumpy especially the back yard that is full of junk.
Y’smom: Hi. I moved in to a duplex and the landlord is a strange difficult man that really can;t be talked with. I *love the neighborhood. The day I took possession the neighbor in the duplex came over and told me the walls were paper thin and you could hear everything and made a big deal of it. So upon moving in, I tried to put my bedroom furniture in the office area away from the shared wall, it did not work and I had to take the bedroom next to hers, the night before I moved my furniture, I slept here, on a floor mat, as did my cousin, we were tired, did not talk, used the restroom and slept. She came the next day after I moved my furniture and told me at 11PM on a saturday she heard me trip and could I not do that because her sleep is precious and her husband surfs and she was just “warning” me that they need there sleep. I was nice and exhausted and said sure I will try. It continued almost daily. She hears me use the restroom, open my drawers, even brush my teeth, and she complains. She threatened to call the landlord to have me kicked out. I was irritated but I invited her over for cake, I gave her flowers the one night I got in a at 2 am. I offered to split the cost of a white noise sound machine with her for both of our peace of mind. She came over with her husband and refused the offer and complained my dog cries when I am away. indoors, crying, not barking. I am a small female with a quiet older dog, I sleep normal hours, I am not up late and I do wake up early. I am about to pull my hair out if she will not leave me alone, the other neighbors think she is being ridiculous, but I do not know what to do, her threat with the landlord concerns me a lot, as does her laying into my dog. I wake up and don’t get up to use the restroom because it wakes her up! By the way, they also wake me up, but I just put on my space heater and ignore the sound. I need to wake up for work at 4:45 starting next month, get ready and be dressed well and walk the dog who will be home during the day. I talked to a friend and he said I had the “right to private enjoyment” and to file a police report that I am being harassed. I would prefer being on good terms but I am concerned because her complaints are both unfounded and escalating and my home is very expensive and pretty and I would like to enjoy it. The landlord is not a good person to talk with unfortunately and I think that would do more damage than good, any ideas how to handle this? Thank you.
John: Some neighbors cannot be ignored. There are laws against harassment. For example, hanging wind chimes next to your bedroom. I advocate taking these people to court.
Wallace Sowell: Do home owners have any rights? I know they say we do. But listen to all these horror stories about bad neighbors, which I also have.
What laws are there that protect homeowners?
What laws are there that will hold landlords accountable for their tenants?
Cowles: Recently someone bought the house next to me. Both of our properties border a large creek that has a seasonal salmon run. It is very pretty, but because of the creek’s location we are limited as to what we can do on our land. Right after buying the property next door the neighbor illegally logged off all of the timber including two trees that were not even on his land. Soon after he diverted water that ran down his driveway during a heavy rain storm and flooded out my garage. He did get into trouble with the state and local authorities for the logging. Now he is selling the home. It has truly been disgusting to have to live next to this. I have found that some people just don’t care about obeying the law or the rights of the people around them.The best of luck to any of you who have bad neighbors.
Toniya: One blogger stated it perfectly. You can try to live with people peacefully but they refuse.
You are quiet and polite and make no noise. They return the kindness with nastiness and whatever other evil that comes out of them.
Brian: Positive story alert! I live in Pine Bush NY. I am the neighbor that plows everyone’s driveway. I plow both next door neighbors and two families across the street. Why? I am not really sure. I have a tractor with a snow plow and the seeing the them struggle with hand shovels is gut wrenching. It takes me 10 minutes to do each driveway when by hand it would take them an hour or so. I do not accept money, but have found a gift certificate to Applebee’s in my mailbox.
Mary: u r awesome thats super cool
Loyda: My neighbors pump the music to crack of dawn they block our way to our walk way to our apt with their car we’ve spoken to them nicely and you know what all they’ve done is make worst i’ve complaint several times to the landlord and all i’ve gotten back from him after 4 yrs is there will always be something wrong every where i go what an a he rented to these salvages with no moral respect to others i don’t leave my home any more i’ve gotten sick and the fact that all he cares about is if they pay the rent they aren’t bad people the drug dealing them getting doped up i see they are good people i’ve had enough of this i’ve been looking for a new place but instead of landlords question me i question them is this a safe and quiet place cause the truth is im not leaving the situation im in to start the same old same old some where else i feel for all of yous im living my own night mare but take a stand and no we don’t need to live like that question your next landlord it’s best to let them know that some places aren’t worth the trouble no matter how beautiful the place is i’ve here 4yrs and 5months out of the 4 yrs we lived happy we had this drunk that for 3and 1/2 yrs made trouble turned the neighbors against us was always in our face finally she moved out but not poisioning the landlord against us when i thought we we’re finally free he brings this people in and now it’s like if you don’t it move out is he for real neighbors and landlords from the pit of hell.
CG in SJ: OK…obviously this yahoo has never really had “bad” neighbors; Parties until 4 a.m. with work the next day… loud vulgar yelling back and forth all night… music, TV, and the “boom-boom-boom” well after even the bars close is just not acceptable…I came to this site for ideas and assistance, not some California mumbo jumbo of how this is my fault. Idiot.
JG: Wow, are you always this much fun?
Trust me man, I know what you are talking about. When I wrote this post, I was watching my hair fall out because of our ghetto red neck neighbors parking their NASCAR trailer right up along our property line. Ummm…let me go down this list:
1. Little white Maltese that liked to bark ALL the time. ALL THE TIME. Gotta love those little white dogs.
2. Parties that seemed to go on way too often. When their idiot friends came over, they would actually park on the lawn right next to our house and on the road in front of our lawn.
3. Seems like everyone in this town had a full size backhoe that they liked to run early Sunday mornings. For what? Who knows.
4. Floodlights that they decided to turn on at 2AM so they can smoke their ghetto cigarettes on the back porch. They just happen to shine through our bedroom window at night. We actually had to hang 3 sheets over the window to stop the light from coming through. No joke.
5. The dirtbag across the street just had to have his piles of garbage piled in his driveway…FOREVER. Old machines, old swing set, old lawnmower that didn’t run anymore, etc…
6. Same dirtbag has a nasty habit of burning said garbage in his backyard. The whole neighborhood stunk like burning plastic. The nice town we lived in didn’t see that as a problem as long as he had a permit. Burning plastic isn’t a problem?
Oh, the list goes on and on. When I wrote this post, I was holding myself back from taking things into my own hands. I tried to look at things from a different viewpoint.
We eventually had to move. For your reference, you can’t change a bad neighbor. You have to get away from them and leave them for other people to deal with. If you try to do anything other than get away, you will just make things worse. After we left, we both had nightmares of seeing these scummers show up in the new town we live in. I still get freaked out a little bit from the trash we used to live next to.
Oh, by the way, thank you for calling me an idiot.
Irene: Reading about everyone’s bad experiences makes me feel a little better about living underneath the inconsiderate that are my neighbors. These jerks have parties constantly, and they’re like 40! Their guests are too. They stomp up and down the stairs and destroyed the lobby once as they were leaving at 3 in the morning. What rude! The woman wears heels and walks so heavily all day. Who wears heels in the house? Maybe some hot young thing checking herself out in the mirror, but this is. Frizzy haired and middle-aged. After the party comes the. I am so sick of hearing the moans and groans and now it’s worse because I can put an ugly face to it all. GROSS!!! I’ve called the cops, complained to the landlord, and even knocked on their door. Nothing helped. I might just leave a bag full of matter in front of their door and light it on fire.
Laine: I’m sure this works swell when the neighbors do talk. But when every time you try to approach them to resolve issues, not even the ones you have with them, but the ones they have with you and they just shout bad names at you and slam the door in your face, it’s kind of hard. So what do you do if your neighbors refuse to talk to you? We went to their landlord and it’s helped with the property damage they were causing (shooting our chickens and any glass they could see in our yard with a BB gun and pouring foul substances through our RV vents in the roof) but they hate us more than ever. Our next step is to again talk to the young man’s step-father (he’s older than us, but he acts like he’s 2 so therefore he is a young man in my eyes) and try to get him to not sell the house to him. His father is a sane well respected lawyer, but his wife (the man’s mother) just babies him and rallies for him, so we’ll see what happens. I just want them to go back to Colorado and leave us alone.
Mark: I moved out of my own fully paid off townhouse because of lousy neighbours.
The woman thought she was the most high class teacher to ever grace the face of the earth and to prove this fact she allowed a mentally unstable unemployed car salesman to move in and make an absolute pest of himself.
The first incident happened one Friday night when they recognised me at a local bar/restaurant and they sidled up acting friendly and trying to get free food and drinks out of me. When I said no things got nasty and he started a fistfight.
I never laid charges thinking that they would just stay away from me after that. Things were quiet for about 6 months and then they started harassing me with loud music at all times of the night.
The worst times for the music were school holidays when it would go on until 3 in the morning, I would have to go to work barely functioning and they would get to sleep in all day.
I eventually started confronting them and writing letters to the managing agent of the complex and that kept the noise down for a while but my car would mysteriously be vandalized.
Things came to a head when he assaulted someone else in the complex and I happened to witness that, charges were then laid and I was the star witness.
I had already signed to buy another house by then and was 2 weeks away from moving out so missed many of the fireworks after he realised that we were serious about having him locked up.
He was found guilty of that assault and they have recently sold their place, I hope that they are not moving anywhere near my near house.
Stuart: Glad to hear a lot of people have wacky or worse neighbors.
I am surrounded by irritating neighbors. I cannot believe how inconsiderate some neighbors can be. Of course they are probably oblivious to the situation.
Best course of action is to move away from the problems. Wish I could, not real probable. Have to bite my tongue and put up with the nonsense.
Hope that I don’t snap!
Tash: I have rented this house for 4 years, 2 of those l tolerated loud music at all hours, loud cars and slamming of doors. Tried the letter (polite) explaining what the loud music etc is doing to this household didnt work. Tried the police didn’t want to take it that far. have you found neighbours seem to know when the police are turning up as the music goes down so quick. In turn you are made a fool of by the police as they cant hear what the complaint is about. Talk about getting nowhere. Then l went into the local council and got the owners details well he received a letter with dates times abusive language, the house being tampered with. That worked shock horror. If it isnt one thing its another this street is becoming a downright hole. I work 6 days a week up to 10 hours a day and respect ha there’s none of that around here when it comes to music yelling and loud cars. Even neighbours taking their fights onto the street. Come on what ever happened to respect went out of the window. Now l am intending to move in November enough is enough. Sick of being nice and some neighbours deliberately having loud music on my day off when they know its my only day off. They think because they own their house they have more rights. Everyone has rights but to a point, why cant people enjoy a BBQ with music in their backyard on weekends during reasonable hours these days? No more miss nice at least l wont stoop to their level. Ignoring works after a long time but why should we have to change our lifestyle to live peacefully?
Christie: I can tell you from experiences of my own that dealing with neighbors by using kindness is all good if the neighbors are willing to comply with it. Not everyone can respect they neighbor, lets be real!! Some people have no class. As you said for those generally wanting revenge, sometimes is justifiably so. I know I have felt it and I am usually very kind and giving. These neighbors of mine are rude, obnoxious, threatening, violent and are on there way to becoming prisoners when they turn 18, I guarantee it. I am sure it comes from the Mom never being home, the same mom who buys them there cigarettes and liquor!! So sometimes being nice an trying to work things out does not happen, then what are you left with to do? How does someone get rid of these kinds of neighbor? I have tried the manager of the apartments, the police, CPS and the states attorney, yet nothing can be done unless they use violence or do property damage, but by then it’s to late. So any advice now?
Emergency Room Girl: Mrs Robinson, For Example, The Last Few Months That I (Knew) Her, In Northeastern Texas, Was Causing Troubles For Everyone, Not Just Me, But Everyone….Mrs Robinson In Northeastern Texas, One Day, Invited Me Downstairs To Her Apartment, (I Guess She Was Just Lonely Or Something) And I Went Downstairs, (Because Like I Said, I Guess She Was Lonely Or Whatever) Which Was Fine, And Then She (Mrs Robinson) Started Asking Me All Sorts Of Questions, All Sorts Of Question Such As: Where Are Kids Parents Today?! (I Was Already Well Into Adulthood) But Anyways, She (Mrs Robinson) Went On With Asking: Where Are Kids Parents These Days?! (As I Said, I Was Already Into Adulthood Already) And Then She (Mrs Robison) Went On To Ask A Really Strange Question To Me: Have You Ever Considered Getting A Lobotomy Dear?! (She, Meaning Mrs Robinson, Continued On To Ask Me, That Really Strange Question, About Ever Considering Getting A Lobotomy…..) I Just Got Up, And Said That My Social Worker Was Comming Over Soon, To Take Me To Therapy! (I Told Her,Mrs Robinson That Is, Is That My Social Worker, Which I Did Have, Was Comming Over Soon, To Take Me To Therapy! Which Was True!) She (Mrs Robinson Asked Me: Why Do You Have To Go So Quickly, Dear?! Stay Awhile…..) Mrs Robinson Then Continued On To Ask Me, Why I Had To Go So Quickly Dear?! And Why Don’t You Stay Awhile?! That’s A Good Example Right There….The Landlord Eventually Told Her, That She (Mrs Robinson) Had To Pack Her Stuff, And Leave, She (Mrs Robinson) Had To Pack And Leave, Because She (Mrs Robinson) Was Causing Too Many Problems, At That Apartment Complex, In Northeastern Texas…..The Landlord Basically Threw Her (Mrs Robinson) Out For Being A Pesty Apartment Tennant, To The Entire Complex….(The Entire Complex!) That’s A Good Example…..
Smith: We bought a half double home 4 years ago. After the first week, we had nothing but problems with the next door neighbors. Turns out they are real a**holes. In and out of their front door every 5 minutes after dark, slamming it. Come and go in expired trucks with no exhaust every 5 minutes after dark. They always disturb the peace. These people seem to be mentally challenged (retarded). They live like slobs and do not maintain their property. They park 8 pickup trucks on the street so we do not have parking sometimes. I have a huge list of issues with them. They should be locked up since they are fined a lot and like to harass people. We are just sick and tired of these lowlife shitfers. When you confront them about anything, even loud parties after midnight during the middle of a week, they want to scream and fight right away. I think they are on drugs and are just plain stupid. Worst neighbors ever. They also lock their dogs in their basement a lot and we can hear them cry and scratch their door. No police or authorities want to do anything about these people. They are lowering the value of my home by letting theirs look like crap and not fixing anything. Keep in mind this is a half double home. These people really should be locked up. Anyone in this neighborhood will agree with me. They have a bad reputation with everyone here.
Their day is coming very soon and I will be LMFAO.
Shannon: I have an alcoholic neighbour who constantly brings home a lot of shady people who are known to the police. She always sets her fire alarm off and once actually left the house while burning a fire in her backyard causing the alarms to go off. My husband had to put out the fire. It was so close to the house that had a flame caught, all our houses would have burned down. All our houses are connected and there are children on either side of her. It was a beautiful neighbourhood until she came around. Now her next door neighbours are moving because they can’t stand her. It’s really sad. We’re doing what we can to persuade potential neighbours to not rent the house and informing them of the hell that will befall them should they choose to live next to Jane. I don’t want revenge I want her gone. She is a danger to all of us by bringing these individuals. They constantly steal her things and recently started banging on other neighbours’ doors when they can’t get into Jane’s house. We’ve called the police a lot but they just take the offender away and a new one shows up the following day. HELP ME!!
Chaundra: oh and to add onto what i was saying above. when the landlord fixed the door where it couldnt be slammed anymore, he had put somthing on it where it would slowly close by itself ok well now the people above will prop the door open in the middle of winter so that it freezes in here our door on the front of our apt. are like these thin double doors with 10 glass panes on each side and is locked by a chain lock, so kinda like french doors almost so the air comes right in and in the summer when our air is on they leave the door proped open so the heat stays in they are just ridiculous people and when they come in they make sure they stomp all the way up the stairs and all the way down them and are as loud as they can be. and just dont care~ WHO LETS THEIR DOG Pee ALL OVER SOMEONE ELSES STUFF???? WHO DOES THAT?? ITS DISGUSTING!!!!!!
Dolores Deisher: My neighbor is so nosy she watches from her window 24/7. She just recently complained about some buildings being to close to property line. So now I have to move them. But, yes they will be moved to the back yard for her to enjoy and maybe painted a new color. She likes to yell at my children. My children was playing in the yard and she calls the police. A new neighbor moves in the area and she introduces herself and tells him he can park in her sisters field. Then she calls the police after he parks in the field. She wants me to move because she wants to own all the land. I have lived with harrassment too long. I installed cameras and I think I will invest in some evergreens. But SHE IS CRAZY!!!
Joan: Used to live in the city, moved out of the city to the upscale suburbs. Own and paid off my end unit townhome, lived here 10 years. For the past 4 years, have had tenants renting next to me. IMO there is a big difference between owners and tenants in townhomes communities. The current tenants for the past 3 months are white trashy folks that should be living in the city or a trailer park. Can her the male tenant screaming at his kid…. “get in your *** room, *** this, *** that!” My 6 year old grandaughter hears him screaming and asked me what is that and is scared. Last night, big snowstorm, I rang his door and told him he had to move his car out of the street so the plows can get through (HOA rule-no parking in the street when it is snowing). He then starts screaming at me. I don’t even feel comfortable in my own home. I specifically left the city to get away from these type of people. I could give you a laundry list of HOA rules violations, but what do they care, they don’t own the place.
Dennis Teel: The original poster here lives in lala land..he’s wrong,most people DON’T get all polite when confronted..i’m a member of … btw..the OP sounds like he’s either one of those people who’ve been complained about OR a wingnut who believes we should all get along and tolerate one anothers loud overpowering bass at 1am(as though they have some kind of right that i never heard about to do so). what the OP has failed to bring up ,are any of the circumstances brought up in these forums.this is why i say he’s decietful..people who bass your walls out at 1,2 or 3am know very well they can be heard(unless their helen keller) and just don’t care.people who are hanging around in their cars in the apartment complex parking lot boomcarring at midnight know full and well that they can be overheard and in fact are attempting to gain attention by doing what they’re doing/.the original OP is no doubt on some disney stuff.by all means,if the punk next door to you is blasting music at 2am,call the cops…and do it everytime he gets stupid.he’ll learn sooner than later!!
Lauren: I have this lady and her men and she has 2 set of twins and
She is a ford and omg her little boy come in my
Yard I wrote her letters tell her about her boy coming in
My yard and she still does nothing and her kids keep come
Up are drive way and at night 2 and they almost got hit
By one are cars and there yellow lab is idot he bark non
stop
Rebecca: We have a neighbor that is a shut-in because she is a nutjob. She has nothing to do all day but write letters to various departments within the city where we live complaining about us and making up false situations. She doesn’t work. She didn’t even buy her house, she got it thru inheritance. Her husband ( I don’t know how anyone could marry this witch) leaves for work at around 5am and returns around 6pm–while all day she sits around. The second he comes home, she is screaming at him–literally screaming for him to take out the trash. He should take out the trash–take her down to the curb and leave her there! We are at our wits end. We have no idea what we can do to stop her from harassing us. The city has to investigate all reports regardless of how phony they may be.
Sanam: I have a neighbor who has a growing junk pile in their backyard. This does not make for a nice view from my backyard. And fences are illegal in our neighborhood. UGH!
Luis: This post contains GENIUS advice! I think it will work with my current neighbor, who is not like some of these nightmare neighbors described above, but just a little messy. I will volunteer to help him with his nascent vegetable bed, and ask when he’s going to barbecue again and if I can drop by . . . hopefully making him more aware of his surroundings and mine . . . THANKS!
Duke: I’am currently preparing to attend a hearing with the board of directors at the complex where I live due to 4 filed complaints that my dog was barking, these complaints date from 2009 thru 2011 and the association is wanting to charge me $1,000 for the 4 occurances. I have lived at said complex since 2004 and have adopted my dog in 2007. My dogs barking, which happens seldomly and usually settles down after a few minutes. My neighbor is elderly and is retired, which means he’s at home most of the “day” (with his own dog) when the barking occurs, my other neighbor have no complaints. I do not wish to collar my dog with a bark prevention devices nor can I afford to send him to a dog daycare. Has anyone ever had to deal with something close to this? If so, how did you go about it? Please help, Thanks.
Jessie: Very few things in this world are more annoying than listening to someone else’s dog bark. Besides crying kids in a restaurant. I left my last apartment because of a barking dog. It wasn’t fair. The owners never know their dog’s barking is so annoying to everyone else. Either that, or they don’t believe it.
READ THIS AND JERKS NER UR HOUSE WILL BE GONE: when ur 9 yrs old like me you can do some sneaky tricks and get them to move away… i had an old lady who was my noeber and she had CATS i mean like 5… she was surely a cate person… and u know what i had… a DOG!!! she madly starred at me and yelled when she was mad at me…. i gave her the nicname hitler…. now ive had lots of people but she was the worst…. back to the chase… the thing that gets most of the jerks near my house away is pretending like the house is haunted…. i have some tricks but of corse they only work on old people… BUT always remember… the best way to get ANYONE out of there house is to make them beleave its haunted…. and if you dont beleave me.. another way is to also make them so mad at you they TOTALY leave, also you can make them think they have creepy people near there house (dress up as a murderer, or nautsy and say hi ect.). BUT STILL the thing that gets most people out of there house… IS MAKING THEM THING ITS HAUNTED…. trust me. this will help you your whole life.. and it always helps me to….
OH!!! and ps: you shouldnt do this by yourself. its best in groups of 3-6.
Y’s Mom: Jesse, before you move on account of sound, buy a Marpac sleep sound machine. it’s dreamy.
Bernadette: I need help with a terrible neighbor they live their thru housing they must know some1 their cause me &7 other households on my block sent complaints 2the housing authority &they came &fixed their house up.these ppl r bad i busted the son breaking in2 my privacy fenced backyard 2steal my puppies,they tried 2break in my house but my alarm went off they stole my speakers out of my car,across the street they jacked this guys car4 times his hub caps(they actually had the nerve 2put then on their car&said a friend have it 2them&my good neighbor didnt have a reciept or serial# so cops did nothing)my next door neighbors dog got out&the a**holes(father,2sons,some friends)came out wit brooms &bats &beat the dog in the middle of the street(the dog did not go near them)i was out watering my lawn&then the dog owners got in a big royal rummble im the middle of the street also down the street they broke in2 a familyhome x/wife&baby home stole 1000$ hes car &hes husbands .22 police have been told all this can ne1 help me?!
Annoyed Neighbor: I wish someone could help me with my neighbors. the first apartment when you walk in the front entrance on the 1st floor. I just don’t know what to do. This is the 3rd night in a row that they have awaken me at 2,3,4 in the morning with their loud obnoxious. I really don’t think its fair to the neighbors like me who have to work M-F 8-5 and need my sleep! I can hear them through the walls, not only that but I wear earplugs and they still wake me up every time. I think its really sick and narcissistic that they do this night after night. I just don’t know what to do though, I don’t know how to go about communicating to them that they are torturing me. It’s 4:30am now and I am unable to sleep because they woke me up sure to ruin my whole Saturday ahead affecting all I have to do today.
Jessie: If there is anyone who can help me or has any ideas or if I can just warn the next tenants of this building to stay away from … its not worth it and the property manager is a passive-aggressive jerk too who doesn’t care about anything here. please email me with any help please. thank you so much! And if you’re looking to move in here, don’t bother! the rent is great and all the other neighbors are too, but this guy and his sickness really ruins it, don’t even get me started on summer when its hot and you want to sleep with the window open but can’t due to the sounds that come out of his room.
Skip: I plan on giving all the bad neighbors in my life the SKUNK bomb, this consist of an egg drained of the yoke and whites and repalced with pure skunk oil from the hunting store, or maybe a syringe full in an open car window..or on there favorite patio.
Follower of Christ: I Live In A Apartment Were There Are Gang Members And They Smoke Marijuana Everyday And The Smoke And Smell Always Come Into Our Unit..They Also Start Playing Their Music Loud At 7 In The Morning..I Informed My Landlord About Them But All He Cares Is About The Money..I Call The Police And They Don’t Care..All They’ll Say Is For Us To Move Out..Why Do I Have To Moveout For The Problem Isn’t With Me Its With The Neighbors..What Can I Do About This Situation?
Realistic: Wow. Dear author of this blog- You are obviously one of those who would not take your sick kid to the doctor but instead make a daisy chain and pray. Good luck with having no grasp on reality. Not all of us have it as easy as you do . Some of us face actually threats, assaults, and danger from neighbors. Some of us require orders of protection against neighbors due to their violence, Until you have been in the shoes of people who have had their day to day lives turned upside down by criminals and sociopaths , save your idiotic love-one-another b.s and your passive aggressive reprimands for someone who has the time. Sanctimonious freak.
uNEEDtoCHILL: Glad I don’t live in YOUR reality!
PodWalker: There are bad people out there, not everyone is basically good/decent as stated. Selfish, inconsiderate people who do not care who they disturb, what nuisance they cause, if they disrupt their neighbor’s lives, if they eventually cause their neighbors to move out. They are horrible, mean and nasty people who actually enjoy harassing others. It gives them a sense of power. I have bad neighbors who moved in a few months ago. They have turned our lives into a daily stress.
If I retaliate with noise they escalate their noise. Am I supposed to simply sit back and say “oh well, let them be”? Whilst they destroy my quality of life? Rubbish.
Smith: Podwalker, If you read this, I seem to have the same kind of neighbors. No, do not sit back and just let it be. Do not ever let anyone walk all over you and disrupt your quality of life in your own home. I fight back as much as I can without doing anything illegal. The thing that bad neighbors hate the most is when your kind to them. For example; Call the cops if they are disturbing you, that pisses them off. Then wait a day or so then say hi to them or wave to them. Its the little kind things that annoy them. Bad neighbors enjoy harassing others and do things to piss people off. If they see you pissed off, they get their jollies on. Eventually they will do something illegal to you or your property then thats when you can get them arrested. Thats what I’m waiting for. I also call the cops anytime they bother me just so that it is logged.
Terry: My neighbor walks her dog with 10 million candel power spot light shining alround how would you like that shinning in your window.To be honest i would love to shove it.
DarkNeo: The liberal’s want a liberal world. ANYTHING a person wants to do should be OK. The ACLU, etc. want people to be “free” of control. Has anyone ever understood the term liberal? It means an impractical form of free of control, no moderation or balance of consideration. Moderation and rules make for a modest form of free life. Shoving it in others faces does not. But as it is said; laws keep honest people honest and the humble, humble. If you allow them to be liberal’ there goes that human factor called selfishness and inconsideration.
Unknown: Yep – We have neighbors one of which was evicted because he tried to beat up his girlfriend or whoever outside screaming at 6:45 pm at night while the whole apt community watched.
The other night a guy that was trying to throw his wife/girlfriend off the balcony. The first
one we called the cops, these people here seem to think that they can break the law and no one
will do a thing.
We will probably leave if this does Not stop because we had no idea we were in a high crime area.
Not a pretty sight at all. But rest assured if I see anything again suspicious I will call the police asap.
I have a feeling the criminals are running the apt community here and they don’t want people
in here who do Not break the laws which would be us. I have asked the cops if they would
drive thru the area just to check on things , they say they have already, and I told them, that I would bet you anything there are things going on here behind closed doors that are highly illegal, just my gut feeling on this. Thanks.
Rupert pupkin: I have lived next to some pretty nasty and stupid people. I have moved several times, always trying to better my situaion. I seem unable to avoid neighbors who are just plain stupid and several drunks (when I learn to avoid these people?) I moved to the country to hopefully get away from people like this and am pretty much surrounded after all my time, trouble, money and caution about who lives around me. (I’ve been the type who has tried hard to be non-confrontational, not adding fule to an already burning fire which has helped me move away from some pretty nasty people-my last neighbor was taken away in handcuffs, I never saw him again, but after 15 years of torture he inspired me to move. I once has 2 drunk neighbors who constantly played their TV loud all night long, smoked incessantly and were aggressive-it was a miracle i didn’t kill both of them because I couldn’t do anything to stop them and lived with constant fear they’d burn the place down and kept me awake constantly. I moved from there too after several years of this horror show as soon as i could afford to. Now out in the country, at least a little it further from my neighbors (I saw the signs this time but chose to ignore them) I lived with ATVs roaring up and down my street for three years until our security finally caught the little sneak-a 500 dollar fine in our community. This bonehead sped up and down with his little kids on these things, no helmets or protective gear. I chose to ignore it as best I could, hoping he would get caught and he did. now the new neighors across the street have their fire going outside, just about every night they’v lived here-even when we had a county-wide very publicized “burn-ban” in effect. The neighbor who lived there before him did the same thing-except the entire fire department came to his house-what fun to see an entire fire company in front of my house, including the cptain yelling at the idiot-i couldn’t help hearing it, they were right in front of my house.I guess these idiots must be from the same family.. We live in a heavily-wooded area and just had an 8000-acre+ brushfire about 20 miles from here that took around 7-8 fire companies to contain so i guess it’s normal to be nervous living near a firebug? The first thing he’ll burn down will be his own house, since it’s downwind from his fire! and we have no hydrants here, the pumper trucks get their water from the surrounding lakes nearby and a small water truck, we’ve had 4 houses burned to the ground in my development in the last 2 years! I’ve tried so hard for so many years to mind my own business with all of these idiots, and fortunately kept myself out of jail by not doing anything. I’m not a kid anymore, and I’m getting tired of moving, but i am thinking there are an awful lot of people around that seem to have no regard for anybody but themselves. or are just too stupid to even realize what they are doing, or too drunk. I have to remember that my being an exemplary neighbor doesn’t guarantee my neighbors will reciprocate, but it has made it easier to see more clearly what I need to do to better my situation. For now, I’ve planted over 50 small evergreen trees around my front and back yard. i hope to live long enough to see these grow to the monster heights they are designed by God for-these are Western Cedar, Thula Green Giants and Irish-Eyes Cypress. Hopefully soon i will not even be able to see my neighbors anymore or at least whoever lives here after me will have some privacy, even if the Manson family move in. Meantime, I have to be patient, and watch my trees grow. Get the fertilizer!
Marie: I have a neighbour who is odd and constantly waits, listens to what errands or activities I will do during the day.
His friend once was downstairs outside the apt watching me go to school while gossiping about me to rest of neighbours. She’s also odd. They both watch a lot of tv and don’t do much. He has people over who watch tv with him and smoke drugs as I can smell it.
Whenever my mum or my friend would come to stay at my place, he would be there all day in his apt listening to my conversations and he would turn volume down from his tv.
He started copying me of some things I do as I find he is spying on me or snooping.
I always look around when I leave to go somewhere if he and his friend will be downstairs or something. I’m nervous, scared and uncomfortable around these odd neighbours. I don’t trust them as they might do something bad
When I’m at my apt, I don’t talk personal stuff as they might listen. I text my friend, my mum and email my relatives.
I leave light off during the day.
I tear my receipts so they don’t look at what I buy or where I go to buy things.
I also wait for them to leave first to do what they do and then I leave to do my errands.
Another time, when I was on my way back from grocery shopping, my odd neighbour was walking the opposite direction of me but kept watching me go home and stopped.
And another time, when my parents came by car to drop off something to me, I came down to them outside. I was speaking to them from car window. I was happy to see them. But as I looked around, there I saw my odd neighbour downstairs same time as me. He kept watching us and just stood there. Fine his friend was talking to him. He couldn’t stop watching us.
I ended up keeping conversation with my parents quick as I was getting uncomfortable with him standing, listening or watching.
I said bye to my parents and quickly went inside. That really made me frustrated, upset inside. I’ll never forget that day.
I have another neighbour that purposely makes noise with her dishes, it varies but stresses me out and I don’t understand. She’s in her mid 50s and single.
She’s nosy too. She one time had the nerve to listen to my phone conversation in beginning when I phoned my mum on balcony to talk to my mum just about different things. My neighbour came onto her balcony and looked at me. And just sat and listened.
That aggrevated me and annoyed me so much. I hardly phone my mum. I only phone my mum when there is background noise ex, the fan or traffic so my neighbour doesn’t listen to our conversation.
Another time, she small talked. Okay I didnt mind as she’s nice
But I didn’t feel comfortable when she asked me a personal question twice.
I rather would move out of my apt than to feel not safe.
Humans-Ebola: Because author is a moron who most likely enjoy making his neighbours go crazy from his incessant behaviour. Just like my current neighbours living above me trampling around like psychotic elephants all night and every morning and screaming slamming doors hammering in the floor. The houseowner is their father/father in law so no amount of complaints have any effect and they just seem to love to terrorize and enjoy being as annoying and egoistic as possible. My conclusion from this is that most people ARE jerks and psycopats who don’t care at all for anyone but themselves. And most of humans deserve to be exised and returned to a more useful compound, like fertil soil. If not this earth has no future because the worst parasitic infestation in universes history are humans who behave like egocynical jerks. Humanity is beyond saving if we judge by the general populace.
Christine Loya: I have neighbors upstairs from me that have a dog or two and from previously experience I now know to have a tarp over my patio so my belongings won’t be damaged and I rarely go to my patio but I noticed when I did I tarp was full of urine and feces on Hay of some sort the smell got so bad I finally complain to management I I also told Neighbors and show them pictures of how my patio look like and I did not even get a sorry I have to clean that mess up and it happened again..i don’t like ruffling neighbors feathers because I didn’t want them to start acting dumb and stomping and being loud on purpose but once I complained again it seems that’s what’s going on now.and I’m getting sick of it I’ve been in this apartment since 2006. I’m in no position to move out right now so what do I do. do I make management stand by the per lease where it states that their pet shall not inconvenience no one .like really?
Timothy: Not every situation can be resolved by sitting down and talking to someone. Some people are just hateful and spiteful. I’ve been living next door to a couple who gossip about everyone who lives here. The wife is addicted to prescription medication. She calls her neighbors begging for pills and cigarettes. When someone says no to them they take it personal. I know of at least two other tenants here who they have lied about to get back at them for telling them no. When I moved in no one bothered to tell me how my neighbors are. I learned the hard way. I am,a very kind giving person who tends to get taken advantage of. They fooled me into thinking they were nice people and before I knew it I was buying them cigarettes and coffee. I started to suspect they were using me so I told them they owed me and that I expected them to pay me back. They got upset and started throwing things in my face. About 6 days later the husband paid me back albeit behind his wifes back. As far as I was concerned there was no longer an issue with them when he paid me back. About a week later I started having problems with them. The husband came banging on my door at 3 in the afternoon one day demanding that I turn off my music I had on or he was gong to call the police on me. I calmly explained to him that I had a right to listen to my music. It was at a respectful volume and I had my doors shut. You couldn’t even hear it if you stood outside my house. He was just being a jerk. He threatened to call the police on me again so I walked out my door, locked it and told him to call the police that I would be waiting for them. He stormed off and the manager called me. I explained what was happening and she told me that my neighbor went up to her office and told her I was starting shit with him. He came back from her office with a scowl on his face and tried to pick a fist fight with me. I told him I wasn’t going to hit an elderly man and his wife came out yelling at me saying “You don’t know who you’re fucking with.”, I went back into my house and stayed there for an hour. After I calmed down I went to another neighbors house to talk to them When the door opened the gentleman who lives next door to me was standing there in another persons house and he slammed the door in my face. Who does such a thing? So I went back to my house and called the manager and told her what he did.
I am a smoker and I have a little table set up on my porch. I go out about 3-4 times a days to smoke. I sit on my porch and I mind my own business. My buddy Kenneth comes over every now and then and he sits down and smokes with me. My nasty neighbors like to come out and run their mouth at me accusing me of being nosy saying I come out every time they have company. They call me a vulture and say that I am listening to their conversations. I am not. One time my sister in law came over on her lunch break and the guy who got mad at me for playing my music came out and told my sister in law that I was picking on the elderly and that I am obnoxious. He said “he starts all kinds of bullshit with us” and he even said I make “terroristic threats” and that he has issued a warrant out for my arrest. None of it true. My sister in law knows better. She asked him not to cuss when he talks to her and he denied cussing. She told him that “bullshit” is a cuss word and he said to her “I been around this whole wide world and everyone knows bullshit ain’t a curse word.” I am not even exaggerating. He really said that. She told my neighbor that she didn’t believe anything he was saying about me and he got upset. He then turned on her and started belittling her saying he was smarter than she is because he went to college for a year. His wife came out and tried to get him to stop arguing but he wouldn’t listen to her. He did eventually go back into his house. I recorded the entire incident on my phone and gave a copy of the recording to my manager. Ever since this incident I have my phone with me and I press record any time these people are near me. I’ve recorded them twice now harassing me. I keep a written log of what they do as well with the date and time. I do not instigate them. I don’t argue with them. I just sit there and smoke and let them run their mouths. Sooner of later they will hang themselves. They are already on bad terms with the management because they’ve ruined their house from smoking in it. The carpet has holes in it and the walls and appliances are yellowed. I heard this gentlemen tell another neighbor he was thinking of pretending to fall on the carpet to sue the management because they refuse to fix anything. Some people are just assholes man.
What to do about bad neighbors? I have got some absolutely horrible neighbors and I’d like some advice on how to deal with them. I read this really long post that offered some great ideas, but I’d rather create my own comment here so I can respond to anyone who writes back to me.
Basically, I live in the country and in my town, anything goes. People are dirty and lazy and their yards of full or garbage. I have neighbors who play music really loudly and others who shoot guns all the time. They have friends over and party past midnight and all the noise keeps me from sleeping. I think the gun shooting is dangerous too, but I’ve been too scared to say something. Also, there are barking dogs everywhere. I don’t know what to do! The situation is driving me crazy. Should I go talk to the neighbors? I think I may get yelled at or hurt if I do. Plus, why should I have to discipline adults? Don’t these people know how to act?
I’ll give you a perspective that you probably weren’t expecting. I’ve actually been one of those bad neighbors. It wasn’t actually me alone, but it was me and some of my friends. This is way back when I was young, so don’t blame me too much. We were all living together in a rental house and we were awful. It’s like we competed with one another to see who could be the loudest or dirtiest. The thing is, I was living with a bunch of guys who were acting like bulls. We got away with whatever we could. We left big piles of garbage around and we parked our old broken down cars everywhere we weren’t supposed to. My advice to you is to call the town. You can even talk to other neighbors and gang up on the bad ones. If they realize that they’re not going to get away with their BS anymore, they might change. We probably would have if someone began getting on our cases. Don’t let them get away with it is my advice.
I have had to deal with bad neighbors so many times. I can tell you that you realistically only have two options. Well, three options. You can call the town to complain and if the neighbors have any sense of decency, they’ll stop being so annoying and clean up their acts. This isn’t likely because once a dirtbag, always a dirtbag. You can also go over to talk to the neighbors yourself, but that’s probably not going to help because if the town can’t change them, you probably can’t either. The town may be able to fine them and put a lien on their property though, which would help. If they’re renters and this happens, it becomes the landlord’s problem – fast. They may get evicted, which would be good for you.
From what I’ve found is that you probably have to move away. Dirty and disgusting people like to live in their filth for a good long time and if their mothers raised them to be the slobs they are, someone else isn’t going to make them stop to clean up anything about their lives. Thinking anything else is delusional. This is why neighborhood associations have been created. Rules and bylaws. I know none of that stuff applies to country living, so I offer you good luck.